The Great Comic Book Blockbuster Bubble

Hollywood is no different than any other big business corporation. Once it finds a potential gold mine it stays with it until the bubble bursts. It’s great while it lasts but woe onto that last move in line that flops at the box office. I use the comic book blockbuster phenomenon as an example because we have not seen the end of more comic book movies in our foreseeable future. As we continue to rush into the theaters to see Spiderman, Superman and Iron Man, Hollywood will continue to give us that over and over again rather than invest in the risk of an original concept.

Superman: Man of Steel earned 400 million dollars making it the highest grossing Superman movie of all time. But this paltry sum pales in comparison to Ironman 3 which generated 300 million domestic and 1 billion worldwide. However, the Dark Knight generated 533 million dollars in domestic sales and over 1 billion worldwide beating both Superman and Ironman as the most popular comic book blockbuster hero so far.

This is not my rehash of the top ten comic book blockbusters. It’s not even a top three list, as my editor breaks his pencil hoping for me to write the next great blockbuster article. My point is that Henry Cavill who played Superman the latest is still building his popularity as an actor. Robert Downey Jr. is an amazing actor and Christian Vale is stratospheric-ally awe inspiring. This is reflected in the box office earnings.

We would love a soup commercial featuring a brooding Christian Vale taking an introspective moment to savor his first spoonful. I own that idea, by the way! Hollywood knows what we want and we apparently want a lot more comic book movies.

We have even more in pre-production as we speak. Wonder Woman, The Flash and Antman among others are being discussed as potential nominees. If history repeats itself, which it often does, the first signs of trouble will be marked by a superhero parody movie. But, for now, with billions in our pockets to spend, the comic book blockbuster bubble shows no sign of slowing down.

References/Sources:

http://comicbook.com/blog/2013/06/23/man-of-steel-now-top-grossing-superman-film-of-all-time-worldwide/

The Advantages of a Shade Tree Mechanic

Almost as important as your personal physician, your attorney and your accountant, your mechanic must be someone you can trust. A personal mechanic is often referred to by the slightly derogatory description as a shade tree mechanic. This mechanic often works for himself in his own back yard rather than a car dealership or typical auto shop. He may also set up a work space in your driveway and work on your vehicle depending upon your relationship with him.

Although a bit tongue in cheek, we will address the very real advantages to finding a good shade tree you can trust. It’s difficult to establish a trusting relationship with an auto shop that works with perhaps ten to thirty cars daily. These bigger shops tend to do a lot of business and they also can be very expensive even for simple auto repair or maintenance. Car dealerships are even less personal. They operate on the corporate level and often will be the more expensive choice for auto service.

Let’s first disperse with the myth that the guy at the auto shop was trained in the ancient art of automotive repair, maintenance and service by monks. It’s not rocket science and the expensive shops and dealerships do not hold the patent on the trade. It’s another myth that simply because a mechanic does not work in a big shop or dealership that his skills are somehow less exemplary. In fact, the contrary is more often the standard. The trick is in finding him.

Same as you would properly vet your physician, attorney or accountant you would also want to make sure your shade tree is knowledgeable and competent in his trade. Word of mouth from your family or friends is often how they get their clients. They perform good work at a reasonable cost and their customers pass the word around. They have developed a relationship of trust and reliability that their customers appreciate.

Supply and demand becomes a factor in the cost and quality of automotive service. Sometimes a shop or dealership can become so overwhelmed that overall service and quality suffers. Rather than a one on one diagnosis of the issue, customers are hurried down the counter to the cash register and out the door with no real understanding of what they actually paid for. Your trustworthy shade tree will ensure you understand exactly what is wrong with your vehicle and what he will do to correct it while also informing you what you can do yourself to extend the life of your vehicle.

It’s common for people to become secretive of their shade tree and will not typically divulge the identity of their shade tree to just anyone. As mentioned, supply and demand can also be a factor with a good shade tree. As his reputation for quality and reliability grows, he becomes busier and you may be put on a waiting list for his services as his work load stacks up. If you’ve never given it much thought try it for yourself. Ask around for a good shade tree and see how people react to the question. You would assume you were asking them for insider stock information rather than a mechanic.

Read more at http://fullofknowledge.com/automobiles/the-advantages-of-a-shade-tree-mechanic/#Zgz94dDHTYJWZfXp.99

Book Review: Where Darkness Dwells

This book kept me a bit off guard in the beginning with its many plot twists. Experienced readers will recognize the author’s writing strategy of providing only enough details in the beginning to make readers believe they know where the story will lead. I found this book to be smartly written, compelling and difficult to put down.

The characters were colorfully envisioned and easily relatable but slightly difficult to identify the main characters. I would have preferred to have remained with the main characters more and less with those on the periphery. To some degree, this led to an overall distraction that caused the storyline to be slightly less frightening than it could have been. In this respect I felt the author left a lot on the table.

Readers like myself, who enjoy not only the character believability but the scenery will appreciate the author’s gentle references to the surroundings that allowed the reader to easily envision the environment. The contrast between the town above ground and the tunnels underneath instantly places the reader in a state of unease.

I found the plot to be disturbing, sadistic and twisted from the very start, which is exactly what I look for in a good horror. It all comes together wonderfully towards the end and nothing is left to the imagination. Be warned, I would recommend this book to my friends who prefer their fear slightly on the deviant side.

Reference:

“Where Darkness Dwells” by Glen Krisch. copyright 2010,2012 by Glen Krisch. Stray King Publishing.

How to Live in a Weakening Economy

While sitting in church before the pastor was to take the podium, members of the congregation discussed the state of our economy. My generation graduating college has learned the opportunities in our fields of study simply aren’t available. And let’s call it for what it is, economic times such as ours create an “employer’s market.” Even if you are fortunate enough to get a job in your chosen field it will typically be a drastic cut in expected salary and benefits, as companies struggle to keep operational costs down. Productivity, innovation and overall prosperity suffer as a result. Economists predict the situation will get worse before it gets better and have no real estimate of when substantial economic growth will happen. For us, this is not encouraging news. This was the topic on our minds at church and on the minds of everyone across our nation.

I have been told for years by my elders that we, the younger generation, have had it too easy. We have, as a society, forgotten what a real trade based economic system means. Again, this term was mention by our church elders. The term trade based economy seemed generic enough, surly I had heard of it in college and written an essay or something on it. I quickly start to click away at my smart phone to look it up but was immediately informed by my uncle, that I would not learn about trade based economy from my tiny magic toy. Feeling more than slightly belittled, I put away my tiny magic toy and listened as my uncle and grand father explained their definition of trade based economy to the church members. As they spoke in the rear of our small church, the entire congregation formed around them.

Paraphrasing, trade based economy is defined very differently by people who are starving than it is by economists. When I think of the great depression I see the image of a Nebraska farm house that appears as if was built in the middle of a desert with tumbleweeds rolling by. I thought of my tiny magic toy as well as all of my tiny magic things and shuddered at the thought of no longer having them. Without rehashing the history books, the great depression was simply the closest America has ever come to becoming a third world country. Our elders explained that even with terrorism, war and environmental challenges; economic collapse has always been America’s only natural predator. And it has stalked us like a hungry beast since we became a nation.

The people of this time did not survive by crunching numbers, analyzing stock market trends or even borrowing from China. They bonded together as a community and relied upon their own skills and talents to help each other. I looked behind me to the long table in the foyer covered with farm fresh produce, eggs, my mother’s homemade quilts and various tools and small appliances. I began to understand.

Countless times that year I had placed my name in a book that sat on a stand at the doorway to volunteer my time to the church. I helped repair roofs, deliver home cooked meals to the elderly in deep rural areas, and cut more grass than I ever had as a kid. I felt I had a real grasp of trade based economy. Then I thought of hurricane Katrina.

Katrina cut a deep scar across communities, cities and townships from the coast and beyond where I live in Mississippi. Even now, eight years later, those scars can still be seen. Many people lost their lives and many of the lost were never found.

The people of my little church came together as a community to help others devastated by the storm with humility and smiling faces. What occurred to me as we listened intently to our elders was that during that time, although hard hit, none of us were without clean water, fresh food, or electricity. The foyer of our little church was stacked to the ceiling with supplies. I had signed the list to volunteer to deliver the food, water and generators to each of the homes on a specified route. The only thing we asked in return was anything that family could spare to help their neighbor even if all they could spare was their time.

We soon realized all of the pastor’s time had gone by. He had sat among us as well to listen to the elders speak. After our unique church service, we all hugged said our farewells and went our separate ways. I realized then that we would be okay. As the economists crunch their numbers and our government weans itself off foreign financing we, as a community, will survive as we always have. I can’t help but to wonder how different our nation would be if real trade based economy as defined by our elders was the official economic system.

Read more at http://fullofknowledge.com/lifestyle-2/how-to-live-in-a-weakening-economy/#hG0Zx3gJaPIu2w07.99

Murder Society

I went to college and studied health sciences because I wanted to help people. I worked for an ambulance service that got forced out by another ambulance service that got forced out by our current ambulance service. And I lost my job along with many others as a result.

I went back school for nursing and worked for East Mississippi State Mental Hospital (EMSMH) and they brought in TB patients without telling us. We were exposed and laid off without notice. Months later, we find out through co-workers we need to get tested for TB. I was exposed and had to take treatment that made my hair fall out. Some of my co-workers have died. We cannot sue EMSMH due to the contract we signed to get the job.

I’ve since taken other jobs that are all similar in nature. I will never be able to save enough to have anything of my own. I only make enough to eat and get myself back and forth to work. These jobs constantly seek to work me overtime but do not want to pay overtime. When I bring it to their attention they become assholes to force me out to replace me with someone who will not complain. So, like many others, I worked and stopped complaining about my paycheck.

But then 9/11 happened, and I watched it as it was happening along with many others. Unlike many others, however I am aware of the back story regarding the Middle East. I have followed the news of Israel and Palestine since I was a child. I am Native American so it matters to me when one people invade a country and take over while forcing the indigenous population out.

You saw 4 planes flown by terrorists hijacked, 2 of them impacting the world trade center and one hitting the Pentagon. I saw 4 events that are statistically impossible happen four times on the same day. I saw two buildings come down with the precision that would have taken professional demolition experts months to plan. I saw a small hole punched into the Pentagon where a large commercial jet liner was to have impacted without one camera in the whole city seeing a low flying jet hovering overhead. I never saw one part of a jetliner in the small pile of debris at the Pentagon.

I see me working my ass off to make other people rich while my tax dollars pay for bombs that kill the children of people I have never met in parts of the world I’ve never been. I pay for this because of the events of that September morning. But, unlike you, I cannot suspend common sense. I cannot unknow that the events of that September morning are a lie. Now I ask you, what the fuck are you seeing?

So I guess we need to have the men in shades to come take me for a drive. We need to send some black SUVs to come disappear my ass. Because I am not paying my gdamned taxes anymore. I am not staying silent anymore. I’m writing books about this. I’m writing articles about this. I’m blogging about this. I’m tweeting it and putting it on Facebook.

With every post I write I am wondering what has made you all so blinded to this blatant lie you live? You work for slave wages leading to taxes, which leads to murdered people and for what? The people of Nazi Germany claimed they did not know. You live on the bones of 100 million slaughtered Native Americans and claim you did not know. If they had been told, then it would not have only been the governments murdering these civilizations. The knowledge makes the people a society of murderers. You wake up, shower and get dressed. You kiss your children and clock in to your shit job and murder someone’s child half way around the world. Do not keep paying your taxes and claim you do not know. I just fucking told you. 

The Hunting Lesson

Some would argue that with our food mass produced and butchered for us, we no longer have a need to hunt and kill our food. But not everything that is done for us serves to benefit us. Have we lost a vital survival trait in our society as a result mass produced food? Some have called the act of hunting cruel and inhumane to the prey animals, even when they are hunted for food.

To be objective, we should address the reason why we hunted before the age of mass produced food animals. First and foremost, we hunted for survival and to sustain our families. This need is met when we buy food from the grocery store. But like so many conveniences we enjoy in society, we pay for that which is readily provided in nature. Then there is the matter in which our food animals are kept and slaughtered.

Few of us could say we have witnessed first hand the poultry farms of the Deep South or the confining pens of the cattle and pig farms. But perhaps a tour of the slaughter houses would be a persuasive argument for hunting. One only needs to see the environment in which a wild deer or boar exists to know that they live much better lives than our livestock. But then there is the cold and brutal act to consider.

When your survival depends upon your food source, you cannot help but have respect for it. You are careful to not waste any part of it. And regardless of your religious convictions, when you give thanks, you are thankful first to the animal that is feeding you and your family. We cannot readily say we gave respect to the animal from which our meat came when we purchased it in the grocery store. Some manner of respect for the beast you killed yourself is unavoidable. We have to learn to not appreciate our prey.

We regain our lost sense of self reliance in hunting our own prey animals. There are many reasons why a nation would ration food to its people, drought, economic depression, a significant natural disaster to name only a few. Can you honestly say what recourse you would have if you were required to provide food for yourself and your family? If this scenario is somewhat removed from you, then simply consider the real fact that you and your family are at the mercy of others for their very sustenance. There was a time when this vital rite of life was in your hands. Regardless what our views may be about hunting, we cannot deny we have lost this independence in our society.

Image Credit : Wikimedia Commons,  This work is in the public domain in Russia according to article 1256 of the Civil Code of the Russian Federation.

Practical Meditation

It is theorized that time is relative. Certainly, our perception of time is relative. We sometimes listen to music while we walk, run, perform aerobic exercises or lift weights to stay in shape. The music helps to take our mind off the monotony of the routine. This is a subtle form of hypnosis we utilize to influence our perception of time.

For writers, the act of mentally composing an article topic or even a scene in a book works especially well in this task. Often, my hour-long walk each day seems over before it began as I play over each sentence of my topic in my head. Also, the clock can seem to come to a dead stop during jobs that require little brain stimulation. Mentally detailing every aspect of a hobby or personal project can help make the time fly by.

Listening to binaural beats before sleep is a relatively new technique I have adopted. Often while lying in bed, I find that my mind is racing. Although I am physically exhausted, I cannot seem to settle my mind to drift off into sleep. Listening to binaural beats for 30 minutes before sleep helps to provide a gentle distraction to quiet my mind.

When I feel myself getting drowsy I simply remove my ear buds and roll over. Moments later, I am fast asleep. Some very effective audio tracks of binaural beats can be found online. Visual projection is a somewhat advanced technique in meditation. It involves seeing what you want on the blank canvas of your mind. I frequently do this while listening to binaural beats.

It takes practice, but given time, you can paint a living portrait of your goal. This only serves as a means to strengthen your resolve toward that goal. Coincidentally, visual projection also leads us into our next technique of directed dreaming. Some of us have developed a mental block in which we cannot remember our dreams. It is said that, although we all dream, we may not always be able to remember our dreams.

Visual projection evolves into directed dreaming by playing out a scene of your goals in your mind like a movie. It is more like day dreaming, except you do this just before sleep while lying down with your eyes closed. Often, you will find that your movie will become a recurring dream reinforcing your goal on a subconscious level. Whether you remember it or not makes no difference, the positive effect is the same.

Perhaps you may scoff at the effectiveness of these techniques and the value of your dreams. But keep in mind, everything we have created around us as a civilization began as a dream that evolved into a visionary idea. We become better at performing new tasks by doing them repeatedly.

In these techniques, you are merely mentally going through the motions of making your dreams come true each night. Just like the ways we learn to more efficiently perform the routine tasks in our day-to-day lives, through the repetition of practical meditation, we find more efficient ways to accomplish our goals.

Image Credit:

Pagan_meditation2-Wikimedia-Commons-CC-BY-3.0-Dedda71-Own-work.jpg

Melodies of the Mind

For those suffering from deep emotional pain, expressing that pain can be difficult. A unique meditation technique is to imagine the sound of your emotions. When we are distressed, depressed or emotionally drained, meditation can help. But perhaps you have not thought to imagine a melody to describe the way you are feeling at the moment.

With practice this is a relatively easy trick to perform. Maybe you already know a song that makes you feel better when you are feeling down. Rather than literally listening to this song, try imagining it with mediation. Feel how it plays in your mind and how your emotions are affected by it.

Don’t be surprised when the song evolves into something completely original. In this act you have composed an original piece of music in your mind. Knowing how to read sheet music is central to getting this composition out of your head and into the real world. Do not take this lightly. This composition is a real representation of the emotion you were feeling. Name the composition according to the emotion you were feeling and keep it in a safe place.

Music is a powerful expression of emotion. Knowing how to write and play music is an effective way to overcome emotional issues. Some believe that within every person is a specific sound. Knowing the instrument that produces that sound is key to selecting which instrument we should learn to play. The sound of the emotions you hear in your mind may be that of a piano, a guitar, a horn or even a drum.

There is an inherent peace that comes with striking the emotional chords of the mind. The music you create is a unique expression of you. Mentally playing out the music of how you are feeling can have a calming effect even if you do not consider yourself a musically inclined person.

Learning to play your chosen instrument can also have a calming effect. Expressing that music physically, even if all you can do is hum the notes, can be a rare gift to yourself.

Reference:

readsheetmusic.info

Image Credit: Wikimedia Commons CC BY-SA 3.0 This is a written sketch for “Radio Noise 24″, by PolyNeon. All rights belong to Dywane Thomas Jr.

Detachment Parenting

I have been seeing a lot of literature on a relatively new trend in parenting with an emphasis on what is called detachment parenting. Generally speaking, detachment parenting only warns against parents becoming overly obsessive in the lives of their children. In its intended purpose, detachment parenting is a healthy and positive approach to parenting which addresses the issues of the parent more so than the child.

It does not condone willful emotional neglect as a parenting strategy. Detachment parenting is a sound approach to parenting, but has inadvertently, shed light on some questionable established parenting strategies. There are many books written on various strategies to help guide parents in the sometimes trying task of raising an emotionally healthy child.

The obvious problem with all of these strategies is that every child is unique and one strategy may not be ideal for every child. Controversial examples include allowing an infant child to cry rather than pick it up. Although children do learn to experiment with power plays at a young age, it is not known if infants have developed the scruples to use their screams and howls as a tool to manipulate their parents. Infants can only cry to convey their pain, sickness or fear.

In this regard, parents read the strategy and acknowledge the PhD of the source, but responsible parents would rather be safe than sorry with crying infants. Other published parenting strategies would seem to suggest that children are simply small adults. Disciplinary methods, developing a rapport, even the topic of sex and drug education have admittedly, acknowledged shortcomings. The problem suggests that child brain development is a factor in the effectiveness of raising a child.

Responsible parents acknowledge the PhD of the sources and address these methods, rapport and the topics of sex and drugs by focusing on the well developed aspects of the child’s brain. These include, competition, peer recognition and consequence association. An emphasis on teaching general responsibility and leadership encompasses many of the lessons we wish to teach our children.

Without flying in the face of the entire body of established parental research by accredited and noted child psychologists, we have simply suggested a few objective considerations. As a general rule, responsible parents acknowledge the sources of suggested parenting strategies, but also acknowledge there is no child in the world like theirs.

Reference: 

Benign Neglect - An anthropologist looks at contemporary parenting, by David F. Lancy, Ph.D.

Image Credit: Creative-Commons-Attribution-2.0-Generic-license – Attribution: “Mike” Michael L. Baird

Planning for College

Education in our society is highly structured and controlled. In many ways it can be described as a train taking a select few bright young minds to a predefined destination. For those fortunate to have access to the best education our society can offer, the destination may not necessarily be where you want or need to go.

For the rest of you with your whole life ahead of you, you must seek to gain the knowledge on your own. What do you want to be when you grow up? Are your goals for your future realistic? Are you prepared for the reality of the career of your dreams? These are perhaps the most important questions associated with your hopes and dreams for the future.

The time to answer these questions begins long before you start sending in applications for college. In today’s world, the appropriate time is to address these questions in Jr. High. Ideally, you should have at least three options for your chosen future dream career. After school and summer should be your time to get a feel for the reality of what it will be like to work in these fields.

Volunteering your time as an intern in your perspective career field gives you valuable insight to separate the dreaminess from the reality of the field. Often, your high school counselor and principal can help set up your internship with local agencies.

You may not be able to intern as a potential fighter pilot or astronaut. However, you can apply for the special programs offered by aerospace agencies for students interested in these career fields. Aptitude tests can be a daunting first glimpse into your chances for testing high enough to meet the educational challenges required to pursue your dream career. Don’t let aptitude tests dissuade you from your goals. Use those scores as markers in the areas you need to improve.

If you are really serious about your future, your aptitude and placement scores can be a valuable tool in helping you realize that goal. Unfortunately, even in a nation that prides itself upon the principles of freedom and equality, the wealth of human knowledge remains inaccessible to the majority of us who cannot afford it. There are opportunities for scholarships, but these are competitive.

There simply are not enough scholarships available for every qualified student. Access to an education is arguably the biggest obstacle between you and your dreams. Fortunately, the advent of the Internet is changing that as well for those tenacious enough to search for the knowledge.

Reference:

U.S. Department of Education

Image Credit: Alumni_Hall_1889_Sun Alumni Hall 1889 Sun Public Domain Author Ericci8996

Loss and the Mourning After

The emotions we feel at the loss of a friendship are not unlike those we feel when mourning a death. This is especially true when the circumstances deem no possibility of reconciliation. These situations present a unique emotional dilemma. The identity of the victim is not clear. The one ending the relationship may consider themselves the victim. The one who must accept the end may consider themselves the victim.

Ties are severed and rapport is denied. Often, this results in the denial of closure for one or both parties. In this, perhaps it can be said the ending of a cherished friendship is worse than the death of a loved one. This would explain why the mourning of a lost friendship can last longer than the death of a loved one.

We can understand death, it is the true finality. We may not always be able to understand the reasoning of our friend’s decision to sever us from their lives. Perhaps our actions merited the verdict of a life long sentence. This does not preclude us as the accused from suffering the sentence. We become imprisoned by the memory of it.

We cannot hope the friend will pardon us; they have often tossed away the key and moved on. We can, however, pardon ourselves. If we do not deserve a pardon based upon rehabilitation, we can at least merit an early release on good behavior.

It can be argued that we as the accused, bear the weight of our nature as sociopaths. I purposely use this term sociopath because it is largely rejected by the psychiatric community as being too broad in its descriptive of the human condition. We tend to label others too broadly, as well.

Can one who mourns the loss of a friend over the course of a lifetime be considered maleficent? Or is one who can so easily sever a friendship with little or no regard for the suffering of the other more accurately diagnosed a psychopath?

So often, articles are written from the high road perspective of the one who should end a relationship. We often recommend that a healthy decision would be to sever ties with the accused and move on for the sake of our own sanctity. How wonderful our world would be if there were in fact, so many of you sanctified as opposed to us very few maleficent sociopaths. In that near perfect world would be fewer wars, crimes, and atrocities.

 Reference:

PsychCentral.com – “8 Steps to Closure When a Friendship Ends,” By THERESE J. BORCHARD  Associate Editor

Image Credit: Best_Friends!_(7573267890) Creative Commons Attribution 2.0 Generic license Author Paul Lucas UK

The Irresponsible Me

Growing up, it seemed every family discussion was about money or religion. Saving money, spending money or wasting money, was our father’s favorite topic of discussion. I have said before, that given three minutes our mother would change any topic to religion. Well, my father would change that topic to money within one minute following. As we grew into adulthood, our wasteful spending of his money evolved into our irresponsible spending of our own money.

What should be noted here is that my father was born in the latter depression era. His father experienced the depression first hand and raised a family through it. They existed in dire poverty which was considered fortunate for them during that time.

For my father, matters of finance are intimately tied to his sense of safety and security. It never seemed to matter if we were doing well or struggling, my father’s outlook was that one could never have enough financial security. He also firmly believed that no man could ever achieve financial security working for another. “You have to make your own mark in this world. Let that man make his own.”

So, my brothers and I walked a narrow path of approval in our father’s eyes. If we were employed, we should have been working toward self employment. When we were self employed, we should have been saving our money. What I know now is that caring about money was how my father cared about everything else.

This concern for our financial security was how he showed he cared about us. It mattered deeply to him that we take matters of personal finance to heart. Often our parents will nag us about money. We come into a small windfall and perhaps, we splurge a little. We treat ourselves for a job well done. Our parents may frown on this. But we should remember this is how they show they love us.

How will we show our children we love them when they are out into the world? Perhaps you sometimes find yourself nagging your own grown children over matters of finance. You may want to include that you only do so because you care deeply for their security and that you love them.

Image Credit: Wikimedia-Commons-Creative-Commons-Attribution-2.0-Generic-license  Author Flick user Jacob Botter

Prisons of Ourselves

Many of us suffer from generalized anxiety, myself included. This anxiety can manifest itself as fear, guilt, worry or sadness depending on the situation. The trigger can be nondescript and the onset can be quite severe. 

Our initial knee-jerk response is a sort of forcible deniability. The result is the emotional equivalent to forcibly holding in a sneeze. The overwhelming feelings of anxiety disburse throughout and leave us feeling emotionally spent and defeated. Medication helps, but does not address the underlying condition.

We may not be able to overcome the fear that we experience in social settings. It is said that we are all mere products of our own combined neuroses. If this is true, we do not need to fear the judgment of others because they are just as emotionally vulnerable as we are. We can make room for the fear rather than become forced out by it.

We acknowledge it, but need not react to it. Our social anxiety is performance based and we need not perform for anyone. Should we have to perform, such as public speaking, this is an act we perform for ourselves rather than for the scrutiny of others.

People in potentially hazardous professions often confront fear and anxiety, but most persevere with a resolve of knowing what is right. Our anxiety does not render us incapable of knowing right from wrong. Making ourselves prisoners of our own anxiety is self destructive and wrong.

Don’t wait for a safe time to act on your goals. Keep in mind that every act may be defined by some degree of fear and anxiety. So in this, there will be no safe time to begin. We may not be able to control our feelings, but we are in control of our behavior to some degree.

Quite often it is easier to reign in how we react to anxiety than to the anxiety itself. Goal oriented thinking allows us the ability to become autonomous. Counseling, and in some cases medication, can be beneficial in assisting us to overcome generalized anxiety. But perhaps, the best therapy lies in our willingness to learn from our feelings rather than being bullied by them.

Image Credit: Wikimedia Commons CC ASA 2.0 Author Liam Quinn from Canada

Net Neutrality, Education and Free Drinking Water

No society that suppresses knowledge can truly be called free.

Historically, the separation of the classes could be clearly defined by the educated and the uneducated. Those who could receive the knowledge prospered while those who could not struggled. Historians may argue that, second only to religion, the suppression of knowledge is the single most definitive factor resulting in the downfall of governments.

Today, the suppression of knowledge by our own society is not as overt as it was in the long dead societies of history. The public message in our society is that everyone deserves to have access to higher learning, but is there evidence to suggest the contrary?

If fresh drinking water was strictly controlled and came with a price tag, one could say everyone deserves fresh drinking water. But unfortunately, not everyone can afford it. Helping the poor afford fresh drinking water, then becomes a complex issue.

But simply releasing the control of the water supply and providing it freely to everyone easily resolves the issue. Then the argument becomes about the billions in lost revenue by making fresh water freely available. Feel free to make the leap on your own.

Withholding fresh drinking water from those who cannot afford it is both immoral and sadistic. Now that we can agree with the premise, let us address the withholding of the wealth of human knowledge from those that cannot afford it.

People in prison are free to read books. Ironically, prisoners in our society have access to higher education at the expense of the taxpayers. The taxpayers themselves must pay upwards of six figures for the same access to higher education. A student having the aptitude to attend an Ivy League college has the same opportunity to receive a higher education as any felon serving a ten year sentence. Aside from the crime, the only difference is who pays the tuition.

The Internet could be as easily provided to the public as public television, yet it is strictly controlled and becoming increasingly costly. Access to higher learning could be freely provided to the public via a freely accessible Internet. However, then the argument becomes about the billions in lost revenue by making both the Internet and higher learning freely available.

Feel free to make the leap on your own. With apologies to Internet service providers and Ivy League colleges; it can be argued that withholding Internet and higher education from those who cannot afford it is both immoral and sadistic.

Returning to our fresh water analogy, we can address the issues a society would face by withholding fresh drinking water. While earning billions from the selling of fresh drinking water to those that can afford it, the society spends trillions in the cost of preventing the remaining masses from dying of thirst. Apply the analogy to the withholding of the Internet and higher learning and feel free to make the leap on your own.

Returning to the lessons of history, we can clearly see the result the suppression of knowledge and oppression of the people has on the stability of a nation. We need not even look that far back when we think of the plight of Egypt today.

The frightening lesson for our society when we consider Egypt today suggest our own issues are a self correcting problem. Does this future apply to our own society which is currently propped up by 17 trillion dollars in debt? Feel free to make the leap on your own.

Source: Reference Net Neutrality

Scam Nation

Not very long ago, an American company was founded upon its quality products and reliable service. A business that lost the consumer trust would not last long. Government regulations on business practices were strictly enforced. We understood the threat a private corporation posed to the public if it was allowed to become too large.

Perhaps, the most well known example of this was when the american government ordered the Bell Telephone Company to break up into several smaller companies. The reasoning for strict government regulation was to protect free enterprise and the growth of a competitive market.

Today, the size and power of some American companies dwarf that of the Bell Telephone Company. Some have even argued the pyramid scam has become the new corporate financial model in America. Gross misuse of investor funds by financial institutions would have once landed guilty parties in federal prison. Today, they get government bailouts. What will be the result if our laws governing corporate business practice continue to be ignored?

Unfortunately, the current state of our economy suggests the issue of bloated corporations and rampant greed is a self correcting problem. One could argue corporations have fallen victim to their own advertising. There is a ceiling on how much a product or service is worth to the consumer. The consumer pushes back once this point is exceeded.

The most famous example of this regarding over taxation was the Boston Tea Party when the people dumped all the tea arriving from England into the Boston harbor. Today, millions of Americans regard working 40 hours a week only to have nothing left over after taxes and living expenses no different than being unemployed.

Those with valuable skills have opted to work for themselves in their community rather than work for an employer’s low wage . Others have simply dropped out of the work force to live off government assistance. These are examples of public backlash and why we have laws governing corporate business practices. When taxes on a people exceed the cost of living the economy suffers as a result.

Price gouging in times of crisis is a punishable by law. We are typically, reminded of this after natural disasters. Cable companies are charging as much as $200 a month for television. Even those who can afford it question the logic of spending that much for entertainment in a distressed economy.

Being overcharged for bad television and after-midnight infomercials may not be a crime. But cable companies also provide our Internet services. Most employers now only offer online applications for employment. Government agencies typically offer online assistance as an option to sit on hold for as long as 2 hours waiting for an operator.

Many resources we need for college course require access to the Internet. People are literally ashamed to admit how much they pay monthly for their phone plans. We are beginning to see more people sitting in coffee shops and even fast food locations logging in to the Internet rather than being overcharged by their current Internet service providers.

In this time of economic distress, perhaps it is time for our government leaders to dust off those old laws governing business practices. As mentioned earlier, this is a self-correcting problem. On sinking ships it does not matter how wealthy you are. The dead weight is tossed over the side first.

Off the Market

What do you want to be when you grow up? This is an important question in high school and the smart choice is to intern in several potential career fields before committing to one. It is also an important question when considering settling down for a lasting committed relationship. The premise is the same, but internship considerations for a committed relationship will be slightly different.

When you feel you are ready to settle down and get out of the dating scene, it is ideal to do so between relationships. This is not to say you should exit a great relationship if you are in one currently. It simply means that as a single, you can be up front with a potential partner on what your needs are. If you are currently in a relationship, you can begin to move toward addressing these needs with your partner. Either way, long-term commitment should be mutually agreed upon.

Making room in your heart for another is more than simply about caring deeply about someone. It involves valuing the other’s needs as you would your own. This is a vulnerable position for you, but is an integral part of successful relationships.

This must be mutual in a relationship, so a giving nature is important in a potential partner. It’s not necessarily about pampering, but about making important and difficult relationship choices that benefit your partner. Your potential partner will need to exhibit this same trait as well.

Searching for a companion when you are ready to settle down only requires us to alter our dating criteria somewhat. In the past, we may have gone on a date and found the other to be too needy, clingy or too uptight.

We need to reevaluate our definition of these descriptive labels to determine if these are honestly needy, clingy and uptight people or if that was simply our own outlook at the time. Remember, in the dating scene you may be labeled needy or uptight now that you are looking for commitment.

Compatibility is perhaps the most misunderstood concept in relationships. You may think simply because you had a wonderful time on your first date you are compatible with that person. Because you share the same destructive habits with another does not mean the two of you are compatible. Often an honest and sincere person who is shy or nervous on a date would rather remain quiet than lie to or mislead you.

Equality and mutual respect play important roles in committed relationships. Both partners have their strong points in certain areas. Letting your partner make all the important decisions is not a trait of a healthy long-term relationship.

Your partner should acknowledge your strengths and rely upon your decisions in these areas rather than foolishly decide for you both in matters of which he/she has little or no understanding.

Having mutual goals is arguably the most important aspect of a committed relationship. Even if everything else about the relationship is perfect, if either of you must sacrifice who you are for the other, you are treading a slippery slope.

Some degree of sacrifice is called for. It may be prudent for one to take a low paying job while the other completes college. But an ideal partner will prioritize your enrollment into college even if he/she does not find a great paying job after graduation.

Dream Catching

Many of us regard our dreams as no more than nightly flights of fantasy, having no practical use in our lives. But perhaps you have not considered that everything we see around us is the product of dreams made real and put to practical use. In fact, all the things we see around us is the product of the merging of many dreams by many imaginative people throughout history.

The concept is really quite astounding when we view dreams from this perspective. We tend to think we have a fairly good grasp on reality. Considering we have established that everything is the product of dreams, how can we relate to reality without understanding our dreams?

The products of our creativity are bound within dreams and we owe it to ourselves, if not the world, to understand them. But our dreams could be clues to something much more astounding. But how do we piece the dreams together?

Our dreams can be somewhat elusive. It is believed that we all dream, yet we may not remember them upon waking. This is due to a fascinating trick of the mind. Simply speaking, the part of the brain where dreams come from does not speak the same language as the part that holds our waking consciousness.

Some have argued we do not dream in color or even hear the sound in our dreams. But others argue that none of what we would call a dream is remotely discernible from its source.

Our conscious mind gradually begins to regain control of our perception from our subconscious mind before we awaken. The raw material of our dream is translated into a format we can somewhat decipher during this brief transfer. For this reason, a dream only teeters on the periphery of our short term memory. If we don’t concentrate on remembering, it is gone in an instant from our perceptual memory.

But, this is not to suggest it cannot be recovered. Keeping a dream journal can help us retrieve the dream even if we do not think we had one during the night.

True dream journaling is not just about documenting the dreams we remember having. It is a process of retrieving and placing our dreams into context. A dream journal can be used to retrieve the memory of our dream by using keywords that pop into our mind moments after we awaken.

You should date and document these keywords moments after waking even if all you have are the keywords. Some have reported seeing a startling pattern emerge from their long-term journal entries. There are peculiar aspects of dreams that suggest they are much more than mere byproducts of our conscious observations. Some examples include seeing our faces blurred in mirrors, being called or referred to by a name other than ourselves and even experiencing the perception of being another gender.

Perhaps, the most startling aspect of dream journaling is that many claim they were able to find who they once were in a past life.

MARRIAGES OF INCONVENIENCE

We all make mistakes in life. Some are easily corrected while others are not so easily mended. The act of getting married is not so much about committing to another, but about merging one’s life with the life of another. You accept every aspect of that person’s life as you would your own. What should you do when you realize you have made a mistake in judgment?

Many of us are aware of the potential problems we will face when we choose to accept our partner in our lives. Our deep emotional bond with this person may cloud our judgment from the reality of those issues. Differing life goals encompass a wide range of issues that distress married couples.

Simply agreeing to give up your dreams and plans in support of that of your partner will not vanquish your desire to live out those dreams. The bond between you and your partner is severed in that moment whether you choose to remain in the marriage or not.

The ideal of being equally yoked is often quite different in reality. While one takes a role of dominance and the other assumes a role of submission, but this is only personality characteristics. Your submissive wife may be infinitely more qualified to handle the family finances than you are. You may be more suited toward working a low paying  job while she goes on to college. We cannot always choose our strong points.

Perhaps, this wasn’t your ideal plan for the marriage, but building upon the strengths of a family is a mutual benefit. Marriages suffer when issues of pride and self defeat divide the partners. We tend to think marriages fail because one partner feels held back. A marriage can be fated to failure when one partner chooses to free the other to experience their full potential.

Staying in a distressed marriage solely for the children is admirable. It is not ideal and perhaps some would argue this is not a good enough reason to stay married. Children alter the priorities of both partners significantly. From the moment of conception your priorities, and that of your partner’s, shift toward raising the children.

Regardless of what you have been told, an ideal home family structure for a child involves both the biological mother and father. If it were any other way, we would all be capable of conceiving children asexually, but children only require this structure for a short while during those crucial developmental years.

They are capable of dealing emotionally with a divorce once they are old enough to remain home without parental supervision. This also greatly reduces the complications of divorce. Negotiating custodial rights can be amicable considering the children are old enough to tend to themselves and perhaps travel from one home to the other on their own.

Granted, there are a myriad of other valid reasons divorce would be warranted, such as domestic violence, adultery and prolonged substance addiction. But we have addressed the more common factors that constitute what would be considered irreconcilable differences. Properly addressing such issues greatly reduces the emotional as well as the legal ramifications typically associated with divorce.

Wrestling with my Inner Liberal

I consider myself a practicing conservative. I may not agree with everything my fellow conservatives do, but I tend to lean more in their favor on the overall issues. My problem comes from what I refer to as my inner liberal. This is that tiny voice in my head that play’s devil’s advocate and causes me to question my own conservative values. This is frightening. Because the more I learn about the world around me the more I am in danger of becoming a liberal!

The benefit of being a conservative is that there are a lot of us. It is rare for one of us to find ourselves in a room full of liberals. The liberals are like the other guy. They are those we talk about, but really never see. If we do see a liberal, then he is typically the quiet minority in the room. We conservatives have our perception of what liberals are. My work typically, places me face to face with real liberals. And it is becoming harder for me to be conservative when I see the issues from their side of the fence.

I counseled a young single mother with three young children struggling to survive and facing the prospect of losing those children. I am not oblivious to the fact that I was hired for this part-time position as a result of my conservative views. My mental conservative handbook clearly states the young woman got herself into this mess. But I cannot help but to feel compassion for her. My inner liberal says that not all situations are so clearly defined.

The next woman I met would have faced the same fate as the first, but made a difficult choice that she is struggling to live with. Again, my conservative handbook is very clear. Yet my inner liberal references the heartbreaking struggle of the young mother who will surely lose her children.

Although I may not agree with their decisions, I begin to have compassion for those who must make difficult decisions. I guess I am coming to terms with my inner liberal. I secretly refer to myself now as a hybrid conservative. No longer do my freedoms begin where your ends.

I’m not sure who coined that phrase. I have found that the issue is not always simply about freedom of choice, but more often about consequence of choice. I still have my conservative views, but I now have a great deal of respect for liberals. I may not agree with their choices, but I have learned their choices are often very difficult and not taken lightly.

Image Credit: Trish Steel [CC-BY-SA-2.0 (http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-sa/2.0)], via Wikimedia Commons

The Monster Within

It is said that within each of us is that which we hide and that which we present to the world. If it can be assumed that we present the best of ourselves outwardly, then what can be said of that part of ourselves we hide? We may not be proud of what can be described as our dark side, but we cannot deny it is equally a part of who we are. Can accepting our dark side make us a more complete person?

Perhaps, if we can come to understand the root nature of where our baser urges originate we can benefit from them. In the old days, we could not objectively explore our dark side without the assistance of a talented psychotherapist.

Today, we only need to look into our laptop files to see what our dark side prefers. Our computers are often the keepers of who we really are. Within them are the parts of ourselves neatly separated into files. What would a loved one think if they happened upon our opened computer? What would the F.B.I. think? Are we feeling somewhat uncomfortable yet?

Some would argue that a person who has something to hide is guilty. Others would argue that someone who has nothing to hide suffers from deep repression. But this does not mean you cannot win in the realm of the dark side. We merely need to acknowledge and accept all of ourselves rather than only the portions we admire.

When discovered, the evidence of our dark side is often placed on display like a crime scene. We are tried and judged by others based upon what is discovered. But if the jury were able to understand the true nature of what they were seeing their verdict may be entirely different. We will example a common dark side item typically found by chance in the hidden files of your computer.

Porn would be the most commonly discovered secret in a computer left opened . In relationships, discovery of the porn collection can become quite an issue. Your partner may assume you are somehow dissatisfied with the relationship or even question your fidelity.

In truth, this is the question you should have long since asked yourself. Upon reflection, you may find that your porn collection is not an exercise in deviance at all, but an appreciation of aesthetic beauty. The early works of Michelangelo and Leonardo da Vinci could have once been easily considered porn for its day. Are those that admire these works regarded as deviants today?

In the search for the inner source of your porn collecting you may discover your inner creative side. Perhaps sketching your partner and making her a work of art to be admired for centuries to come is a better solution than attempting to explain to her why you collect porn. What we have exampled is a positive outlet for something that would typically, become a flaw in our psyche. There are many examples that apply. Imagine the dark urges of your favorite authors of horror fiction.

We wonder what type of demented mind could rend and tear the flesh of his fellow man, yet gladly, appreciate him for removing the tumor from our bodies. How would your talented surgeon’s dark side have manifested itself had he not pursued a career in medicine?

Barring the existence of past physical or psychological trauma, our dark nature is often a manifestation of our creative wellspring. Identifying the source of that nature becomes vital in knowing who we are. Perhaps, then our dark proclivities become something we would gladly present to the world.

For those of us who missed our calling, perhaps the evidence of our dark side is best kept hidden behind secure passwords and buried in non-disclosed locations.

Image Credit: dark-road-MorgueFile-By-howaral.jpg